The Joy of Giving a F**k

personal self v/s professional self, which one are we liking, sharing, forwarding today?

So there is this rage and upsetness over facebook. People have stopped posting as much as they previously used to. People don’t share as many photos as before. You don’t see people checking in and sharing where they have landed or which airport they are taking off from. Maybe now you do not know where your ex gets his latte from or which park your bestie walks her dog. Oh boy, we are all missing out on the excitement. Life is empty because your feed has gone dry and stale :(

Fear not there is HOPE in the name of another big brother, Linkedin!

What? Are you kidding? Linkedin is purely professional. People don’t go here to show off or one up each other? Professionals go here to exchange professional views. Write about leadership. Show how they are better and share tips. Share which conference they are speaking at. Check in and let everyone know what project they are working on at the moment.

People who are on Linkedin are not like people on facebook, absolutely not. They have no fear of missing out #fomo.

What they do is very natural and exactly what professional should be doing in a noisy world. If you are a zen leader you will share mindful moments. If you are an empowered small business you will surface and share content that extends your brand. You will forward articles and like posts. With so much talk about design thinking and machine learning and everyone able to multitask, professionals have to talk louder than the other person to be heard. That is not #fomo. They have to check their feed twice or thrice a day and update everyone on what they are reading, writing, saying, hearing, doing. It is not at all like facebook where people check in twice or thrice a day to share their mindful moments. Extend their personal brand by sharing photos. Forward articles and like posts.

When I stepped down as the Executive Director of Kids & Art Foundation in 2018 after celebrating its 10th anniversary, I suddenly found myself on Linkedin. Everyday. Yes, twice and thrice a day.

I had to update my profile. Prove my existence. Show my worth and more. It almost felt like I had to work hard to make sure people noticed me. Wait, have I started dating again? Am I sixteen again? I suddenly felt I was making choices and applying myself in ways that did not make any sense. Why did I have to prove what I’m good at? Why did I suddenly feel like I was in grade school and trying to raise my hand and jump up and down just so that the teacher will pick me? Why?

So today I decided that I will do something I have not seen on anyones profile… honesty. I will talk about the years I had to set my career aside to become a cancer caregiver. I will add the months I could not get out of bed after I lost my nine year old son who fought cancer for six of his nine years. I will proudly talk about my resilience and wear it as a badge of honor and not wait for someone who is hiding behind an algorithm to notice my resume.

Oh that must be what is called the joy of missing out #jomo. Yes, I will happily become part of that narrow group of people and not let facebook or linkedin dictate my self worth. I am who I am in spite of life turning out the way it did. My design education saved me and helped me redesign my life whenever I needed to but the people who cannot see between the jaded, noisy, over stimulated world, failed me.

It took me a year of trying to fit in to realize that one size does not fit all. I feel so liberated and free. I finally do not have to tip toe around the choices I had to make in life because of the cards I was dealt. I look forward to not apologizing for the 6years 9months professional gap in my life. I look forward to where the creative tide turns and takes me along. I look forward to becoming a lifelong learner and doing what I love and coining new terms like #jogaf. Yup you got it right, joy of giving a f**k!

Don’t take me wrong, I love to consume media. I love to read, love to write, and love to learn. I’m not deleting my facebook or linkedin profiles. I just found this constant talk of personal v/s professional very biased and conflicting. Lets call a spade a spade shall we.